The Power of Forgiveness: Accepting the Apology You'll Never Receive

One thing you can begin implementing into your life today to drastically improve you life and relationships is this: 

You must learn to accept the apology that you’ll never receive. 

This is Forgiveness.

We go through life and hold onto all of the hurts, pains, and traumas that have been cast on us by people that we love, and people that we’ve known. 

We carry the weight for our entire lives in some instances, and think to ourselves, “I can never forgive them, look what they did to me” 

What most people fail to realize though, is that forgiveness isn’t about the other person. 

It isn’t about liberating them from the pain that they've caused. 

It’s about liberating yourself from the pain that is within you. 

The burden of resentment doesn’t weigh them down, it weighs you down, and subconsciously it affects so much more than you can see. Just look at how you feel when you think of that person or the event. Physically, your body goes into it's fight or flight response. Your brain releases cortisol and adrenaline preparing for a fight. (and you're sitting in your car by yourself). In addition, your muscles get tense. Which is the physical manifestation of stress and unresolved tension. Can you now see how you're carrying the burden?

The truth is, everyone has been hurt, and everyone has done the hurting. We’ve all said things or made choices that caused pain to others—often unknowingly. Just as you may feel toward someone who hurt you, there may be people in your life who carry similar feelings toward you. And many times, we’re not even aware of the impact we’ve had on others. We move through life, often unconscious of the wake of destruction we've left behind with our words and actions.

This unconscious living is the norm for most people. They don’t think; they react. They let their emotions steer their words or actions, without a second thought to the ripple effects it may have on others. 

When someone like this hurts you, it’s likely they’ve long forgotten about the incident, while you continue to carry the weight. Much like you being unable to recall the instances that you've created the same pain in other people.

So how do you break this cycle of pain? Start by humanizing the people who have wronged you. Consider what might have made them who they are. What have they been through? Were they once that wounded child, just like you? Perhaps they had absent or abusive parents, or maybe they faced their own traumas, or succumbed to their own demons. This isn't excusing their behavior. But by carrying the burden, you are allowing them to hurt you over, and over again, for years.

When you understand that most people are carrying their own broken pieces, it becomes easier to let go. Unforgiveness breeds more pain, more trauma, and more unforgiveness in a never-ending cycle. But it takes a strong person to break free from the past—to decide that they will no longer carry the burdens of what was done to them.

True strength lies in accepting the apology you’ll never receive. It’s not about making peace with the person who hurt you; it’s about making peace within yourself. And I can assure you, that once you make peace, as happened to me, your shoulders will get lighter, and your eyes will see brighter. - This is the Power of Forgiveness.